How To Fight Cultural Differences In Marriage And Stay
Happy
by Marina Smiley
When people plan to
marry, they expect to find in their partner not only a
lover but a friend also. A person with whom they can share
their opinions, their emotions, thoughts and fears. In
marriage we are looking for a partner who will be able to
understand our values, our likes and dislikes.
If a man and a woman are
born and raised in the same country, most likely they are
familiar with the same songs, movies, jokes, books and
life in general. They basically have the same roots. In
the case of a western man -foreign woman family everything
is more complicated and requires much more patience and
understanding from both spouses.
On one hand each of the
partners has an opportunity to learn a great deal about
the other’s country, culture, traditions and life styles
which can be very interesting.
On the other hand it can
be very disappointing, the inability to understand your
partner’s excitements and, or frustrations. For example,
say you are watching the television and suddenly you see a
famous actor or singer, or other type of an artist whose
name you have grown up with. Maybe this artist was an idol
for your parents and the music of this artist was often
played in your house when you were a child.
Now seeing this singer
on television reminded you about your parents and house
where you grew up in . You nostalgically remembered the
tree that you saw from your window. You feel very light
headed about this memory and want to share this feeling
with your foreign wife.
Unfortunately you
realize that she is unable to understand your feelings
because she has no idea who this artist is. Her eyes are
absolutely empty, she has never even heard the song
before. You cannot believe it ! You tell her that this
artist is so famous! Everyone knows him! How it possible
that she doesn’t know??? Your light feelings of nostalgic
disappear and instead you feel within your soul at very
large disappointment ...
Be patient! Don’t become
upset so quickly. Remember that your wife has the same
situation with you. You don t know her country’s songs,
her country’s famous actors, her books. She has her own
memories and in actuality, for her, everything is much
more difficult than it is for you. At least, you live in
your own country where everybody can understand you. She
lives in completely strange surroundings, where she has
nobody to share her feelings with, except you.
Do some research and
learn about your wife’s country, culture and lifestyles.
Talk with her, ask her questions, get to know what songs
she likes, what movies and books are of interest to her.
The Internet will give you a great opportunity to find
anything! Tell her about your country’s culture, let her
listen to the music that you like, rent a movie for her
that left you with great impression. Let her understand
you better through the things that you like. Patience and
time will help you to fight cultural differences .
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Marina Smiley is the author of Love
& Sex with Russian Women-Tips for Men
and
Your Russian Bride-The
Shocking Truth. These popular ebooks challenge the common view on Russian women as family
oriented and sacrificing. They reveal facts that
marriage agencies will never tell you about and serious
men must know.
